"Whoever drinks of the water I shall give will never thirst; the water I shall give will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life" John 4:14
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Could I Love You Without Approving the Way You Chose to Live?
It seems more and more I am coming across articles and comments from others about this false notion that to love someone means accepting everything about a person and supporting their choices, even if those choices are inherently bad for them or go against our conscience.
Love and Acceptance ≠ Supporting or Encouraging Bad Choices
This post could be lengthy and explore deeper concepts of love, but instead I am going to just skim the surface to make my point.
First of all we have to understand and acknowledge that individuals can and do make choices that are wrong. Yes, there is right and wrong, no room for relativism here. We can and do make choices that can be detrimental to our physical, emotional and psychological well-being.
Secondly, we also have to realize that our choices affect others. Nobody lives in a vacuum or on an island. When we make a choice for our own lives it affects our family, friends, our community and the whole world.
Lastly, we need to be aware that our wrong choices actually lead us to that dreaded 3 letter word we are all guilty of “SIN”
As we read in the Catechism of the Catholic Church
# 1850 Sin is an offense against God: "Against you, you alone, have I sinned, and done that which is evil in your sight." Sin sets itself against God's love for us and turns our hearts away from it. Like the first sin, it is disobedience, a revolt against God through the will to become "like gods," knowing and determining good and evil. Sin is thus "love of oneself even to contempt of God." In this proud self- exaltation, sin is diametrically opposed to the obedience of Jesus, which achieves our salvation.
I’ll focus on two of the comments I have come across lately.
#1: “God is all loving...He loves all His children”
Certainly there is truth in that comment, so I say “Amen” to that, however part of loving His children includes providing guidelines and teachings on what is good and what is evil. What is beneficial and what is damaging for his creation.
#2: “The God I believe in...” Wait a minute....
Are we created in His image, or trying to create God in our image? If we can create God then we could do so in a way as to justify all our actions to aid us in drifting through life on a cushy marshmallow cloud as we justify everyone’s individual choices and fail to acknowledge the damage being done to ourselves and the world around us.
Christ says it many times in scripture, He does love each of us, and he came specifically for those who were making bad choices, living sinful lives, in fact he was criticized for hanging out with sinners – He came for sinners, he loves them but he never justified their lifestyle. He came to show them there was a better way and called them to repent and once they experienced His love they did make their free will choice to repent, to change their ways and follow Him.
Best to read it in His own words, so here are some references:
Mark 10: 21 Looking at him, Jesus felt a love for him and said to him, "One thing you lack: go and sell all you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me."
John 14:23 Jesus answered and said to him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him.”
John 8:11 Jesus addresses the woman caught in adultery and says, “Go, from now on sin no more.”
Luke 19:1 -10 After Jesus dines with the chief tax collector, he promises to give half of his possessions to the poor and to repay those he defrauded four times the amount, Jesus says to him, "Today salvation has come to this house, because he, too, is a son of Abraham. For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost."
So if we are so sure that God loves us, we should be working to repent, not to justify our own sinfulness.
God created us; He’s the loving Father, calling us home to heaven. He designed our bodies for a specific purpose. He created our human nature, so He knows all there is to know about His creation. Any act that goes against this specific purpose, this human nature that God designed is the sinfulness we need to repent from, after all, Christ came to redeem the sinner, not to justify the sin.
So that is why, following Jesus’ example, YES, I can love someone even though I don’t support or encourage the lifestyle they may have chosen to live.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Our Halloween Dilemma...
Since our conversion we have always felt a pull to shy away from all the happenings of Halloween night, we know that if we had converted before our children were born we would have never started the tradition of participating in Halloween.
We didn’t want our children to think our conversion meant they no longer get to take part in fun activities like Halloween. After all they don’t see the harm in getting candy from the neighbours and dressing up as their favourite super hero. If we are going to stop being a part of Halloween we’d have to replace it with another fun activity.
I enjoy hearing about other Catholic families who still hold costume parties for their children with an “All Saints Day” theme. I am going to seriously consider hosting one next year. I guess now that I have put that in print, someone may hold me too it.
In the last few years we have made a point of coming to know and understand the background of Halloween, and it seems depending on which resource we refer to we find varying stories. My favourite is found at American Catholic
We are uncomfortable with entire notion of glorifying evil, so we have placed rules on the types of costumes our children can wear, etc., However, this year there was a new concern for me, as a Mom of a pre-teen boy... the costumes are not just becoming more horrid, now we are finding hyper sexualized costumes for young girls and adult women as well. Hagelin of the Washington Times says is best.
This year when our older son expressed that he has no desire to participate in Halloween, I have to say we did breathe a sigh of relief. We left the decision up to him, but we also did not try to change his mind when he mentioned he’d rather stay home that evening.
Our youngest says, “I’m not missing out an opportunity to get free candy!” We reminded him that the candy is not really free, because Mom and Dad are buying candy to hand out to the children who come knocking on our door. For the candy to be free, we’d have to take him out trick or treating and not buy any to give out. I’m not sure that made any difference to him.
We may do things differently next year...time will tell.
However, what really amazes me is that we live in a society that readily accepts images that are gruesome and horrifying. Why are we so fascinated with walking corpses and representations of supernatural beings like, witches and vampires? Yet, it is so difficult for some to accept that a supernatural being that is all good and loving could exist?
I think about the way Christ and the first Christian martyrs suffered and those images can be pretty gruesome, perhaps for those who are so attracted to those gruesome images for the mere shock value could benefit from a party where we dress up as a one of the martyrs, that could make for some pretty gruesome costumes. St. Thomas More without a head; Blessed Jose Luis with bloody feet after they were skinned off; and many more you can read about more Christian Martyrs.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Sink or Swim
A few years ago, I had the opportunity to sit among a group of young adults and overheard one of them say, “I don’t really believe any of it (God, or the church) I just do all of this for my parents.”
I have to say I was very sad to hear this. Even more sad, that at the time I couldn’t think of a reasonable response.
However, as a parent what struck me was the awareness that one day, one of my children might say this – so I began to ponder, what if...
I’ve seen so many families who have had a child turn away from the faith, so I know my children are not immune. This would certainly pierce my heart, but not enough to make me despair or give up on them.
When I look back on my own youth, perhaps at some point I might have been able to say this very same thing. In fact, my actions did say this to God, loud and clear. I was going through the motions of a Catholic youth because I knew my parents expected me to, but I had not made the faith my own.
What would I have liked to have said that day, to that youth who made that statement?
It is the responsibility of us parents to pass on the faith to our children. We have to have an authentic faith, filled with hope and love. Of course, our hope is that our children will make this faith their own, but until the time comes when they are old enough to chose, parents must embrace the challenge of this responsibility.
If I had a swimming pool in my yard, I have the responsibility to protect my child from falling in, or teaching them to swim and how to engage in safe water play. It would be irresponsible for me to leave it up to my child to learn the hard way, risking that they might fall in and then wait and see if they would sink or swim.
However, just because I have a pool and have done my part to protect them or teach them to swim, doesn’t mean that one day when they are old enough to be left unsupervised (young adults) they might make a choice that proves to be detrimental or even deadly.
If I believe in fundamental right and wrong; I believe in the value of our mortal bodies and our immortal soul then it’s my responsibility to teach my children basic truths of the faith, which means I have to know the faith myself so that I have something to pass on to them. Even after doing all I can for them, if they still choose to turn away from the faith then I will hold on to hope against hope that they will come to see the truth, knowing full well that I cannot force them.
This reminds me of the parable of the sower. When we sow the seeds we don’t know what type of soil has been prepared for us, we hope some of it will land on good soil, and we trust that someday it will bear fruit. Even though some seed may land on rocks or thorns doesn’t mean we should stop sowing the seeds. If we stop then we risk that no seed will land on good soil.
When the time comes for our children to seek the truth, some of the seeds may at that time come to bear fruit.
This is one of the many things I find so awesome about how God works in our lives. He is not intrusive, and he never interferes with our free will. He sets up guidelines for us and then hopes we will come to appreciate that the guidelines are there to help us, not hinder us.
This same fatherly love that God has for us is how we as parents are called to love our children. We are not hindering their freedom; actually we are teaching them to live as free human beings and allowing them the opportunity to make an informed choice.
I have to say I was very sad to hear this. Even more sad, that at the time I couldn’t think of a reasonable response.
However, as a parent what struck me was the awareness that one day, one of my children might say this – so I began to ponder, what if...
I’ve seen so many families who have had a child turn away from the faith, so I know my children are not immune. This would certainly pierce my heart, but not enough to make me despair or give up on them.
When I look back on my own youth, perhaps at some point I might have been able to say this very same thing. In fact, my actions did say this to God, loud and clear. I was going through the motions of a Catholic youth because I knew my parents expected me to, but I had not made the faith my own.
What would I have liked to have said that day, to that youth who made that statement?
It is the responsibility of us parents to pass on the faith to our children. We have to have an authentic faith, filled with hope and love. Of course, our hope is that our children will make this faith their own, but until the time comes when they are old enough to chose, parents must embrace the challenge of this responsibility.
If I had a swimming pool in my yard, I have the responsibility to protect my child from falling in, or teaching them to swim and how to engage in safe water play. It would be irresponsible for me to leave it up to my child to learn the hard way, risking that they might fall in and then wait and see if they would sink or swim.
However, just because I have a pool and have done my part to protect them or teach them to swim, doesn’t mean that one day when they are old enough to be left unsupervised (young adults) they might make a choice that proves to be detrimental or even deadly.
If I believe in fundamental right and wrong; I believe in the value of our mortal bodies and our immortal soul then it’s my responsibility to teach my children basic truths of the faith, which means I have to know the faith myself so that I have something to pass on to them. Even after doing all I can for them, if they still choose to turn away from the faith then I will hold on to hope against hope that they will come to see the truth, knowing full well that I cannot force them.
This reminds me of the parable of the sower. When we sow the seeds we don’t know what type of soil has been prepared for us, we hope some of it will land on good soil, and we trust that someday it will bear fruit. Even though some seed may land on rocks or thorns doesn’t mean we should stop sowing the seeds. If we stop then we risk that no seed will land on good soil.
When the time comes for our children to seek the truth, some of the seeds may at that time come to bear fruit.
This is one of the many things I find so awesome about how God works in our lives. He is not intrusive, and he never interferes with our free will. He sets up guidelines for us and then hopes we will come to appreciate that the guidelines are there to help us, not hinder us.
This same fatherly love that God has for us is how we as parents are called to love our children. We are not hindering their freedom; actually we are teaching them to live as free human beings and allowing them the opportunity to make an informed choice.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Discovering God’s Design...through the Life Cycle of a Butterfly
About a week ago we purchased a Monarch Butterfly rearing kit from a nearby Butterfly Conservatory. It’s a pretty interesting kit, includes 6 caterpillars, a milkweed plant, a cage and all you need to learn about their life cycle and how to tag them, so they can be tracked, usually as far as Mexico.
I should mention that I am usually uneasy around any type of bug or insect, so if someone had asked me if I ever saw myself with pet caterpillars, I would definitely have said, “No way”
I agreed to this undertaking for the benefit of my boys and the children I provide care for, especially since I have mostly boys in my care, I figured this was something they would totally get into, and I was right.
What I didn’t expect is how much I would get out of this undertaking. They are like our little pets, and now they have provided an opportunity for all us to appreciate God’s design for all His creatures.
I am sure most of you reading this know the life cycle of a butterfly, however, if you are like me, perhaps you haven’t given this process much thought. The Monarch egg hatches after 3 – 5 days, and the caterpillar will eat its egg shell. The caterpillar will shed its skin four times, this is called molting, during its 10 -14 days as a caterpillar. When the caterpillars are ready they will attach themselves with silken threads and will hang upside down in a “J” position, very soon they form a chrysalis or pupa. This pupa easily camouflages as it is the same colour as the milkweed plant. This stage will last another 10 -14 days. The butterfly will push itself out of the chrysalis and will hang upside down and it will pump fluid from its abdomen into its wings, which causes the wings to grow in size, in another 2 -3 hours the butterfly is ready to fly away!
What I marvel at is the transformation stage. How the caterpillar has everything it needs to be a caterpillar, and then somehow, instinctively knows what to do, positioning and all, in order to undergo the transformation into a chrysalis and then to a butterfly; at which time it has everything it needs to be a butterfly.
For me this is another affirmation of God’s perfect design; his awesome attention to detail!
The 4 and 5 year old boys I care for are marvelling too and their innocent questions like: How do they change? Why they change? When they take the position and hang like the letter “J” do they know what’s going to happen next? These questions led me to point them to God as well.
I am sure there are countless creatures we could examine to discover more about the mystery of God’s creative design, for now I’ll enjoy discovering it through the life cycle of a butterfly and through the eyes of a child!
Watch this awesome video for a time lapsed view of the process.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Sharing Our Dirty Laundry
Letter from Linda Gibbons...
“Though weary, love is not tired; though pressed, it is not straightened; though alarmed, it is not confounded. Love securely passes through all.” Thomas รก Kempis
Greetings in the blessed name of Jesus...
I am glad you walked out your story journey. Yes, its putting out our dirty laundry but we do it so others won’t have to – their only dirty laundry will be in the diaper pail.
You know of the National Post article it was in depth (read long line of dirty laundry) the night before publication I had a few “nervous tremors” but then I said, “It’s worth it.” Too many are in let’s pretend land, we “fix it and forget it and move on” until it all comes back in spades.
When we write about our dark page others can identify with the struggle to get out of the social mess we’ve faced and our failure to take the moral high road. Our dirty laundry testimony tells them they are not alone in their situation and that abortion doesn’t fix anything and they’ll not soon forget! And moving on or getting over it is not the simple task the feminist tripe imagine. So thanks for the brave outing, may God use it to save a life and a lifetime for mother and child. Life and liberty lived in harmony.
Here is a quote from Steve Jalsevac – he’s with Campaign Life Coalition in Toronto:
“Each individual who values traditional morality and principles must take personal and courageous responsibility to act appropriately on what they know is wrong and harmful. There is no “they”. There is only you.”
Sending you a little poem I know you’ll appreciate:
His Number
While waiting as a mother-to-be,
I heard God firmly speak to me.
To cast aside the world’s device
And become a living sacrifice.
Namely, that my womb should bear
The one He planned to cradle there.
And that no humanistic creed,
Should limit my fertility.
Oh, how I wrestled with that word,
So unusual, so absurd.
Could God? Would God take control?
And what would His requirement hold?
After much debate and doubt,
I threw my own decisions out.
If God can measure earth and sea,
Can He not chart a family?
And if He names and number stars,
Then is His book is each of ours.
We therefore gave Him the right
To build the house and take the charge
A mother now with five on hand,
By faith and grace I have no plan.
But cast aside the things that kill
To let His number be fulfilled.
-Author Unknown
Peace in Christ. Love in Jesus
Linda
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Christ In The Details
As I contemplate today’s gospel, John 1:45 – 51 I find myself intrigued by Nathanael’s encounter with Christ. I can only imagine what Nathanael must have felt when he met Jesus for the first time and yet Jesus seems to know him; he is struck by this and questions him, "How do you know me?"
I have learned through the years that we all have a story, especially about our personal encounter with Christ, while some of us may share a story similar to St. Paul, I am certain that for most of us, God revealed himself to us in a subtle way, just as Christ did with Nathanael.
What strikes me about this is that Jesus is in the details. He cares about every moment of our day, and he is there with us, whether we realize it or not. He cares about us enough to be aware of every moment of our lives. Jesus and Nathanael share an intimate moment, as only the two of them know what is significant about Nathanael under the fig tree. Don’t we all long to share an intimate moment like that with Christ? Isn’t it awesome to acknowledge that we can have those moments, every day?
So whether I am washing dishes, writing this post or listening to the children’s make believe stories, whenever I turn my heart and mind to my creator, He is here with me. The fact that he is such a faithful friend motivates me to be accountable for the times I give into temptation to judge or criticize those around me, at those times I know I can rely on His help as long as I am ready to co-operate with him, he’ll help me overcome the struggles I will undoubtedly face today.
Reflecting further brings more questions to mind...
Could Jesus say the same thing to me that he said to Nathanael? “There is no duplicity in her.”
Am I as faithful a friend to others, as Christ is to me? Do I pay attention to the details in the lives of those around me?
Do I respond as Nathanael did, greeting Jesus as the son of God, and King of Kings?
Picture: Saying Grace by Norman Rockwell
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Favourite Devotional Prayers
I was tagged almost a week ago, by Jenna at Caring Catholic Convert to list my favorite 3 prayers and then to tag 5 other people to do the same.
Here they are:
PRAYER TO THE HOLY SPIRIT
Holy Spirit, inspire in me
what I should think,
what I should say,
what I should leave unsaid,
what I should write,
what I should do,
and how I should act
to bring about the good of souls,
the fulfillment of my mission
and the triumph of the Kingdom of Christ.
Amen.
This provides me with a daily reminder that I can't go it alone, left to my own devices I easily say, do, think or write the wrong thing.
The Litany of Humility
Jesus, meek and humble of heart, hear me!
From the desire of being esteemed, Lord Jesus, free me!
From the desire of being loved, ...
From the desire of being acclaimed,...
From the desire of being honoured,...
From the desire of being praised,...
From the desire of being preferred...
From the desire of being consulted...
From the desire of being approved...
From the desire of being valued,...
From the fear of being humbled, Lord Jesus, free me!
From the fear of being despised...
From the fear of being dismissed...
From the fear of being rejected...
From the fear of being defamed...
From the fear of being forgotten...
From the fear of being ridiculed...
From the fear of being wronged...
From the fear of being suspected...
From resenting that my opinion is not followed...
That others will be more loved than I, Lord Jesus, make this my prayer!
That others will be esteemed more than I...
That others will increase in the opinion of the world while I diminish...
That others will be chosen while I am set aside...
That others will be praised while I am overlooked...
That others will be preferred to me in everything...
Lord Jesus, though you were God, you humbled yourself to the extreme of dying on a cross, to set an enduring example to the shame of my arrogance and vanity. Help me to learn your example and put into practice so that, by humbling myself in accordance with my lowliness here on earth, you can lift me up to rejoice in you forever in heaven. Amen.
-Cardinal Merry del Val, Secretary of State under Pope St. Pius X (!865-1930)
This one is a difficult one to say and to live, but in my struggle to attain true humility, saying this prayer itself has been humbling as many times I have recited it in tears.
Pardon Prayer
My God, I believe, I adore, I hope and I love you.
I beg your pardon for those who do not believe,
do not adore, do not hope, and do not love you. Amen.
This is a new favourite, and actually reminds me of the importance of Our Blessed Mother's role since this prayer was taught to the Sheppard children of Fatima, to whom the Blessed Mother appeared to.
Now for the hard part...who to tag:
Dorothy at Gutsy Catholic Mom
Janelle at http://wwwjanellecc.blogspot.com/
Kate at Momopoly
Stay at Home Mom at Work
Mary Saylor at http://marysayler.blogspot.com/
The rules are as follows:
Name your three most favourite Catholic devotional prayers, and explain why they're your favorites. Then tag five bloggers - give them a link, and then go and tell them they have been tagged. Finally, tell the person who tagged you that you've completed the meme. The Liturgy and the Sacraments are off limits here. I'm more interested in people's favourite devotional prayers.
Here they are:
PRAYER TO THE HOLY SPIRIT
Holy Spirit, inspire in me
what I should think,
what I should say,
what I should leave unsaid,
what I should write,
what I should do,
and how I should act
to bring about the good of souls,
the fulfillment of my mission
and the triumph of the Kingdom of Christ.
Amen.
This provides me with a daily reminder that I can't go it alone, left to my own devices I easily say, do, think or write the wrong thing.
The Litany of Humility
Jesus, meek and humble of heart, hear me!
From the desire of being esteemed, Lord Jesus, free me!
From the desire of being loved, ...
From the desire of being acclaimed,...
From the desire of being honoured,...
From the desire of being praised,...
From the desire of being preferred...
From the desire of being consulted...
From the desire of being approved...
From the desire of being valued,...
From the fear of being humbled, Lord Jesus, free me!
From the fear of being despised...
From the fear of being dismissed...
From the fear of being rejected...
From the fear of being defamed...
From the fear of being forgotten...
From the fear of being ridiculed...
From the fear of being wronged...
From the fear of being suspected...
From resenting that my opinion is not followed...
That others will be more loved than I, Lord Jesus, make this my prayer!
That others will be esteemed more than I...
That others will increase in the opinion of the world while I diminish...
That others will be chosen while I am set aside...
That others will be praised while I am overlooked...
That others will be preferred to me in everything...
Lord Jesus, though you were God, you humbled yourself to the extreme of dying on a cross, to set an enduring example to the shame of my arrogance and vanity. Help me to learn your example and put into practice so that, by humbling myself in accordance with my lowliness here on earth, you can lift me up to rejoice in you forever in heaven. Amen.
-Cardinal Merry del Val, Secretary of State under Pope St. Pius X (!865-1930)
This one is a difficult one to say and to live, but in my struggle to attain true humility, saying this prayer itself has been humbling as many times I have recited it in tears.
Pardon Prayer
My God, I believe, I adore, I hope and I love you.
I beg your pardon for those who do not believe,
do not adore, do not hope, and do not love you. Amen.
This is a new favourite, and actually reminds me of the importance of Our Blessed Mother's role since this prayer was taught to the Sheppard children of Fatima, to whom the Blessed Mother appeared to.
Now for the hard part...who to tag:
Dorothy at Gutsy Catholic Mom
Janelle at http://wwwjanellecc.blogspot.com/
Kate at Momopoly
Stay at Home Mom at Work
Mary Saylor at http://marysayler.blogspot.com/
The rules are as follows:
Name your three most favourite Catholic devotional prayers, and explain why they're your favorites. Then tag five bloggers - give them a link, and then go and tell them they have been tagged. Finally, tell the person who tagged you that you've completed the meme. The Liturgy and the Sacraments are off limits here. I'm more interested in people's favourite devotional prayers.
Twilight Untwisted: Breaking Dawn
Deforming Our Conscience
This was by far the most difficult book of the series for me to read. It took me less time to complete it because I couldn’t wait to be done with this series so I picked it up as often as I could. I prayed before and after I read it, because I was considering not completing this read. I know some may ask, “Why did you read it?”
As I mentioned in my first post on this series, Twilight Untwisted: A Catholic Mom’s Perspective I felt compelled to review this series and it has taken much discernment and prayer to make it through.
Read More...
This was by far the most difficult book of the series for me to read. It took me less time to complete it because I couldn’t wait to be done with this series so I picked it up as often as I could. I prayed before and after I read it, because I was considering not completing this read. I know some may ask, “Why did you read it?”
As I mentioned in my first post on this series, Twilight Untwisted: A Catholic Mom’s Perspective I felt compelled to review this series and it has taken much discernment and prayer to make it through.
Read More...
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Are we all just a bunch of hypocrites?
As per http://encyclopedia.thefreedictionary.com/Hypocricy
Hypocrisy is the act of pretending or claiming to have beliefs, feelings, morals or virtues that one does not truly possess or practice.
Hypocrisy is a deliberate pretence used to convey sentiments or ideas that are false (acting as if one likes something or someone or agrees with a belief or political position when in fact they do not).
What may not be hypocrisy?
Some people sincerely regret that they cannot overcome temptation over some harmful behaviour. An example is someone who says something like, “Please never start smoking. I wish I could stop." Also, some people genuinely fail to recognize that they have character faults which they condemn in others. This is called Psychological projection. This is Self-deception rather than deliberate deception of other people. People understand vices which they are struggling to overcome or have overcome in the past. Efforts to get other people to overcome such vices may be sincere.
"Do as I say and not as I do" is not a false representation of one's own true feelings or beliefs (including moral beliefs). It is the belief that one is above or otherwise not subject to the same rules they apply to others. An adult proscribing alcohol or tobacco use, or driving or sexual behaviour to a minor is an example.
A personal example is how we can minister to engaged couples on the value of chastity and openness to life regardless of the choices we made in our past that may have been contrary to this. To emphasize that now that we see how this can strengthen marriage we want to help others make better choices than we did.
I recall a conversation with someone who was a life-long smoker, dealing with severe lung disease, when questioned if he would have quit the habit sooner he response, was I never would have started.
I’ve often thought, it truly takes a certain amount of wisdom to learn these types of lessons through the mistakes of others instead of having to learn the hard way by experiencing the hardships first hand.
So does this make us all hypocrites? Surely we have all made decisions in our past that time, wisdom and maturity have shown us that in reality the consequences far outweighed any benefit we thought we’d receive.
As we find in Matthew 7:5 “Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of your own eye; and then shall you see clearly to cast the mote out of your brother's eye.” The passage means that it would be ridiculous to help someone remove a splinter or a piece of sawdust from their own eye, if you yourself had an entire log in yours and hadn't first tried to remove it (i.e. attempt to resolve your own flaw).
We may not all be hypocrites, but we certainly are all sinners!
What is the difference? Well, there isn’t really a contrast here, since hypocrisy would also be a sin.
I’ll attempt to illustrate an example...
Two Catholic women, who both know their faith and try their best to live it, are very much aware that it is a mortal sin to miss Sunday Mass. However, while one of them attends every Sunday, the other struggles to make this commitment and occasionally gives in to the temptation to sleep in rather than make the effort to attend one of the many Eucharistic celebrations on Sunday.
Does this make her a hypocrite? No. Has she given in to sin? Yes. The question would then rely on what she does in this state of sin, is she quick to go to confession and does she attempt to discover what the route of the problem is that keeps her away from committing to mass? (That is a whole other post: There is a great book on this topic by Mathew Pinto: Do I Have to Go? )
What does it mean then to be a hypocrite? Well in the above example we already established that the women who occasionally gives in to the temptation to forgo attending weekly mass is a sinner, she could not easily become a hypocrite, by not attempting to overcome this sin. If she remains in the state of sin, and then continues to participate fully in the Eucharistic celebration, or she attempts to pass on to her children the importance of attending mass, while she herself doesn’t regularly attend.
An example of hypocrisy is when one claims to be a Catholic, but holds beliefs that are very much contrary to the Catholic faith.
An example I saw on a bumper sticker while on vacation last week that read:
“You cannot be Catholic and be pro-choice”
Sometimes I think, when I hear the accusation that the Church is full of hypocrites, I wonder if they just mean full of sinners, which in that case they would be correct. We only have to look at the Gospels to see and understand that Christ came for sinners, what better place for us to be then where he is?
Other times, I think what they mean to say is that perhaps they believe we are being pharisaic. Do they feel that we are expecting them to live up to a standard we ourselves are not living up to? If we are all trying, all struggling and in this process we are accepting, loving and taking advantage of all the sacraments, including reconciliation, then NO, we are not being pharisaic, we are expecting that all of us are trying to live a life of virtue and when we fail, we will turn to Christ for forgiveness and a fresh slate.
I’d like to say it as we find in Timothy 1:15:
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.
Hypocrisy is the act of pretending or claiming to have beliefs, feelings, morals or virtues that one does not truly possess or practice.
Hypocrisy is a deliberate pretence used to convey sentiments or ideas that are false (acting as if one likes something or someone or agrees with a belief or political position when in fact they do not).
What may not be hypocrisy?
Some people sincerely regret that they cannot overcome temptation over some harmful behaviour. An example is someone who says something like, “Please never start smoking. I wish I could stop." Also, some people genuinely fail to recognize that they have character faults which they condemn in others. This is called Psychological projection. This is Self-deception rather than deliberate deception of other people. People understand vices which they are struggling to overcome or have overcome in the past. Efforts to get other people to overcome such vices may be sincere.
"Do as I say and not as I do" is not a false representation of one's own true feelings or beliefs (including moral beliefs). It is the belief that one is above or otherwise not subject to the same rules they apply to others. An adult proscribing alcohol or tobacco use, or driving or sexual behaviour to a minor is an example.
A personal example is how we can minister to engaged couples on the value of chastity and openness to life regardless of the choices we made in our past that may have been contrary to this. To emphasize that now that we see how this can strengthen marriage we want to help others make better choices than we did.
I recall a conversation with someone who was a life-long smoker, dealing with severe lung disease, when questioned if he would have quit the habit sooner he response, was I never would have started.
I’ve often thought, it truly takes a certain amount of wisdom to learn these types of lessons through the mistakes of others instead of having to learn the hard way by experiencing the hardships first hand.
So does this make us all hypocrites? Surely we have all made decisions in our past that time, wisdom and maturity have shown us that in reality the consequences far outweighed any benefit we thought we’d receive.
As we find in Matthew 7:5 “Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of your own eye; and then shall you see clearly to cast the mote out of your brother's eye.” The passage means that it would be ridiculous to help someone remove a splinter or a piece of sawdust from their own eye, if you yourself had an entire log in yours and hadn't first tried to remove it (i.e. attempt to resolve your own flaw).
We may not all be hypocrites, but we certainly are all sinners!
What is the difference? Well, there isn’t really a contrast here, since hypocrisy would also be a sin.
I’ll attempt to illustrate an example...
Two Catholic women, who both know their faith and try their best to live it, are very much aware that it is a mortal sin to miss Sunday Mass. However, while one of them attends every Sunday, the other struggles to make this commitment and occasionally gives in to the temptation to sleep in rather than make the effort to attend one of the many Eucharistic celebrations on Sunday.
Does this make her a hypocrite? No. Has she given in to sin? Yes. The question would then rely on what she does in this state of sin, is she quick to go to confession and does she attempt to discover what the route of the problem is that keeps her away from committing to mass? (That is a whole other post: There is a great book on this topic by Mathew Pinto: Do I Have to Go? )
What does it mean then to be a hypocrite? Well in the above example we already established that the women who occasionally gives in to the temptation to forgo attending weekly mass is a sinner, she could not easily become a hypocrite, by not attempting to overcome this sin. If she remains in the state of sin, and then continues to participate fully in the Eucharistic celebration, or she attempts to pass on to her children the importance of attending mass, while she herself doesn’t regularly attend.
An example of hypocrisy is when one claims to be a Catholic, but holds beliefs that are very much contrary to the Catholic faith.
An example I saw on a bumper sticker while on vacation last week that read:
“You cannot be Catholic and be pro-choice”
Sometimes I think, when I hear the accusation that the Church is full of hypocrites, I wonder if they just mean full of sinners, which in that case they would be correct. We only have to look at the Gospels to see and understand that Christ came for sinners, what better place for us to be then where he is?
Other times, I think what they mean to say is that perhaps they believe we are being pharisaic. Do they feel that we are expecting them to live up to a standard we ourselves are not living up to? If we are all trying, all struggling and in this process we are accepting, loving and taking advantage of all the sacraments, including reconciliation, then NO, we are not being pharisaic, we are expecting that all of us are trying to live a life of virtue and when we fail, we will turn to Christ for forgiveness and a fresh slate.
I’d like to say it as we find in Timothy 1:15:
Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.
Twilight Untwisted: Eclipse
Relativism at Its Best
There is a running theme in the 3rd book of the Twilight Series, Eclipse that shows the main character Bella torn between to loves. At first glance one may think that Bella’s predicament is that she must choose between to ‘goods’. Two good-looking, strong caring young men are willing to ‘fight’ to win her heart. Lest we forget that Bella’s choice is actually between two evils – wolf or vampire? [...]
Read More...
There is a running theme in the 3rd book of the Twilight Series, Eclipse that shows the main character Bella torn between to loves. At first glance one may think that Bella’s predicament is that she must choose between to ‘goods’. Two good-looking, strong caring young men are willing to ‘fight’ to win her heart. Lest we forget that Bella’s choice is actually between two evils – wolf or vampire? [...]
Read More...
Friday, July 9, 2010
What is Truth?
Twilight Untwisted: Book 2: New Moon
Excerpts from post found at: http://livingwater2009.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/what-is-truth/
...Bella seems to lack this natural inclination to preserve and perpetuate life. She is the personification of the culture of death in the way that she devalues her own life and disregards the importance of saving her soul.
...When they are reunited, Edward makes an observation that not only sums up Bella’s character but our modern society as well, “Why can you believe the lie, but not the truth?”
Read the complete post
Excerpts from post found at: http://livingwater2009.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/what-is-truth/
...Bella seems to lack this natural inclination to preserve and perpetuate life. She is the personification of the culture of death in the way that she devalues her own life and disregards the importance of saving her soul.
...When they are reunited, Edward makes an observation that not only sums up Bella’s character but our modern society as well, “Why can you believe the lie, but not the truth?”
Read the complete post
Catholic Writers Conference
Catholic Writers! The Catholic Writers Conference Live is Aug 4-6 at King of Prussia, PA. Info/Register http://catholicwritersconference.com/
Video link: http://animoto.com/play/QsIiivcmRlI7XsXnDDTDvQ
Most Current Press Release
M E D I A R E L E A S E
CONTACT: Ann Margaret Lewis
e-mail: annlewis(at)joesystems.com
Karina Fabian
E-mail: karina(at)fabianspace.com
For Immediate Release
Catholic Writers to Hold Conference in Valley Forge, PA
World Wide Web--The second annual Catholic Writers’ Conference LIVE will be held August 4-6, 2010, at the Scanticon Hotel Valley Forge in King of Prussia, PA. Sponsored by the Catholic Writer’s Guild and the Catholic Marketing Network (CMN), and held in conjunction with CMN’s annual retailer trade show, the Catholic Writers Conference LIVE provides Catholic authors with a prime opportunity to meet and share their faith with editors, publishers, fellow writers, and bookstore owners from across the globe.
This year's conference will feature presentations on such topics as market tips and time management for busy writers, poetry, creating evil characters, working with an editor, creating winning proposals, journaling and much more. Speakers include Catholic publishing representatives Claudia Volkman - General Manager of Circle Press, Regina Doman - acquisitions editor for Sophia Institute Press, and Tom Wehner - Managing Editor of the National Catholic Register, all of whom will also hear pitches from writers.
Among the other speakers are Mark Shea (Mother of the Son), Michelle Buckman (My Beautiful Disaster), Donna-Marie Cooper-O’Boyle (Mother Teresa and Me), Susie Lloyd (Please Don’t Drink the Holy Water), and Publicist Lisa Wheeler from the Maximus Group.
“Attending this conference has been the best thing I have done for myself professionally,” Carol Bannon, author of the children’s book Handshake from Heaven, said of the 2009 conference. Her fellow writer Melanie Cameron agreed, saying she left the last conference re-energized. “I recommend [this] conference as a resource for any author (or wannabe) at any stage. You will walk away empowered!”
The Catholic Writers Guild, a religious non-profit organization, sponsors both this live conference in August and an online conference in February to further its mission of promoting Catholic literature. “Our conferences are totally focused on encouraging faithful Catholics to share genuine Catholic culture and faith in their writing no matter what genre,” says CWG President Ann Margaret Lewis. “These events are integral to our mission of ‘creating a rebirth of Catholic arts and letters.”
Registration costs $85 for CWG members, $95 for non-members and $42 for students. There's also a discounted combined membership. To register or for more information, go to http://www.catholicwritersconference.com
Video link: http://animoto.com/play/QsIiivcmRlI7XsXnDDTDvQ
Most Current Press Release
M E D I A R E L E A S E
CONTACT: Ann Margaret Lewis
e-mail: annlewis(at)joesystems.com
Karina Fabian
E-mail: karina(at)fabianspace.com
For Immediate Release
Catholic Writers to Hold Conference in Valley Forge, PA
World Wide Web--The second annual Catholic Writers’ Conference LIVE will be held August 4-6, 2010, at the Scanticon Hotel Valley Forge in King of Prussia, PA. Sponsored by the Catholic Writer’s Guild and the Catholic Marketing Network (CMN), and held in conjunction with CMN’s annual retailer trade show, the Catholic Writers Conference LIVE provides Catholic authors with a prime opportunity to meet and share their faith with editors, publishers, fellow writers, and bookstore owners from across the globe.
This year's conference will feature presentations on such topics as market tips and time management for busy writers, poetry, creating evil characters, working with an editor, creating winning proposals, journaling and much more. Speakers include Catholic publishing representatives Claudia Volkman - General Manager of Circle Press, Regina Doman - acquisitions editor for Sophia Institute Press, and Tom Wehner - Managing Editor of the National Catholic Register, all of whom will also hear pitches from writers.
Among the other speakers are Mark Shea (Mother of the Son), Michelle Buckman (My Beautiful Disaster), Donna-Marie Cooper-O’Boyle (Mother Teresa and Me), Susie Lloyd (Please Don’t Drink the Holy Water), and Publicist Lisa Wheeler from the Maximus Group.
“Attending this conference has been the best thing I have done for myself professionally,” Carol Bannon, author of the children’s book Handshake from Heaven, said of the 2009 conference. Her fellow writer Melanie Cameron agreed, saying she left the last conference re-energized. “I recommend [this] conference as a resource for any author (or wannabe) at any stage. You will walk away empowered!”
The Catholic Writers Guild, a religious non-profit organization, sponsors both this live conference in August and an online conference in February to further its mission of promoting Catholic literature. “Our conferences are totally focused on encouraging faithful Catholics to share genuine Catholic culture and faith in their writing no matter what genre,” says CWG President Ann Margaret Lewis. “These events are integral to our mission of ‘creating a rebirth of Catholic arts and letters.”
Registration costs $85 for CWG members, $95 for non-members and $42 for students. There's also a discounted combined membership. To register or for more information, go to http://www.catholicwritersconference.com
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Over 300 Murders Occurred today...Would the people responsible please stand up?
Today I write to appeal to your conscience!
There are 2 ladies who have been called to fight the good fight in a way that some of us may find radical.
Linda Gibbons and Mary Wagner are currently imprisoned at the Vanier Center for Women in Milton, Ontario, Canada, simply because they seek to remind all of us that abortions hurt women and kills babies.
According to an article posted at LifeSiteNews, Mary Wagner was arrested in March 2010 for speaking with women, workers and even the owner of an abortuary. What is her crime? It appears that in her effort to show compassion to those who are facing a very desperate and difficult decision, she has broken some law or infringed on someone’s right.
Linda Gibbons is a pro-life Grandmother who has already suffered more than 7 years in prison for her peaceful pro-life witness. All she does is walk outside a Toronto abortion clinic with a sign that reads “Why Mom when I have so much love to give” She speaks to the women who willingly chose to speak with her, she does not infringe on anyone, but she is giving the unborn babies a voice.
How many more individuals will be jailed for this before we as a society, as a country recognize that we are all responsible for the 300+ murders that happen every day in the abortion clinics?
When a women feels that she has no other option but to turn her womb, which is the starting point for the miracle of life, into a slaughter house, who is to blame?
We can all point fingers outward in different directions, but we all must realize as it was once said, all that is needed for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing.
Haven’t we done ‘nothing’ long enough?
When a woman makes this desperate decision it’s because we as a society have failed her. She is scared of the unknown, and fears judgement from her peers. She doesn’t feel supported, and doesn’t know where to turn.
These two women, Mary Wagner and Linda Gibbons have shown great courage and great compassion in reaching out to those women who feel desperate and alone; attempting to show them that there is another option. While many of us may not feel called to lay down our lives for this cause as Linda and Mary have, we can and should support their fight.
Join in prayer and then write to the Premier, Attorney General and the Ministry of Health. Let them know how you feel, urge them to stop the injustice being done to these two women.
We are treating them the same way the townspeople treated Jesus when he cured the two demoniacs in the town of Gadarenes – Matthew 8:28 – 34. It makes us uncomfortable and brings us face to face with the consequences of our sinfulness, so we would rather be rid of the radical healer and supernatural lover of justice so we want to send them away from our district.
Let us not be like the townspeople in today’s Gospel, but instead be like St. Paul and join in the good fight, so that one day when we celebrate Canada Day and sing our national anthem we will be able to sincerely sing “the true north strong and free” For until we are a country that values life from conception to natural death, we will not be strong nor free.
God Bless!
There are 2 ladies who have been called to fight the good fight in a way that some of us may find radical.
Linda Gibbons and Mary Wagner are currently imprisoned at the Vanier Center for Women in Milton, Ontario, Canada, simply because they seek to remind all of us that abortions hurt women and kills babies.
According to an article posted at LifeSiteNews, Mary Wagner was arrested in March 2010 for speaking with women, workers and even the owner of an abortuary. What is her crime? It appears that in her effort to show compassion to those who are facing a very desperate and difficult decision, she has broken some law or infringed on someone’s right.
Linda Gibbons is a pro-life Grandmother who has already suffered more than 7 years in prison for her peaceful pro-life witness. All she does is walk outside a Toronto abortion clinic with a sign that reads “Why Mom when I have so much love to give” She speaks to the women who willingly chose to speak with her, she does not infringe on anyone, but she is giving the unborn babies a voice.
How many more individuals will be jailed for this before we as a society, as a country recognize that we are all responsible for the 300+ murders that happen every day in the abortion clinics?
When a women feels that she has no other option but to turn her womb, which is the starting point for the miracle of life, into a slaughter house, who is to blame?
We can all point fingers outward in different directions, but we all must realize as it was once said, all that is needed for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing.
Haven’t we done ‘nothing’ long enough?
When a woman makes this desperate decision it’s because we as a society have failed her. She is scared of the unknown, and fears judgement from her peers. She doesn’t feel supported, and doesn’t know where to turn.
These two women, Mary Wagner and Linda Gibbons have shown great courage and great compassion in reaching out to those women who feel desperate and alone; attempting to show them that there is another option. While many of us may not feel called to lay down our lives for this cause as Linda and Mary have, we can and should support their fight.
Join in prayer and then write to the Premier, Attorney General and the Ministry of Health. Let them know how you feel, urge them to stop the injustice being done to these two women.
We are treating them the same way the townspeople treated Jesus when he cured the two demoniacs in the town of Gadarenes – Matthew 8:28 – 34. It makes us uncomfortable and brings us face to face with the consequences of our sinfulness, so we would rather be rid of the radical healer and supernatural lover of justice so we want to send them away from our district.
Let us not be like the townspeople in today’s Gospel, but instead be like St. Paul and join in the good fight, so that one day when we celebrate Canada Day and sing our national anthem we will be able to sincerely sing “the true north strong and free” For until we are a country that values life from conception to natural death, we will not be strong nor free.
God Bless!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Twilight Untwisted and Re-evaluated
Excerpt from full post found at: http://livingwater2009.wordpress.com/
Edward presents himself to Bella in his true form, how he appears in sunlight, he tells her he is the world’s greatest killer and she continues to place herself in danger, by ignoring the facts.
Edward represents evil as it is in the world, evil presents itself as attractive, alluring, and enticing, we are drawn to it and many respond to evils in society just as Bella responds to Edward.
Read more of this post
Edward presents himself to Bella in his true form, how he appears in sunlight, he tells her he is the world’s greatest killer and she continues to place herself in danger, by ignoring the facts.
Edward represents evil as it is in the world, evil presents itself as attractive, alluring, and enticing, we are drawn to it and many respond to evils in society just as Bella responds to Edward.
Read more of this post
Monday, June 21, 2010
Teaching our Children to meet Christ personally
Today I'll direct you to Dorothy Pilarski's article in the Catholic Register.
Could not have said it better myself.
Have we taught our children to have a personal relationship with Jesus?
Beyond being told, that "Jesus, is your best friend" I don't recall any adult emphasizing this in my childhood/teen years.
Though I do make a concerted effort to teach my boys, that Jesus wants to be their friend and we very often compare how we treat our human friends to how we treat Jesus.
Dorothy does an awesome job of breaking that down in this article.
Children Need to Have a Relationship with Jesus
Could not have said it better myself.
Have we taught our children to have a personal relationship with Jesus?
Beyond being told, that "Jesus, is your best friend" I don't recall any adult emphasizing this in my childhood/teen years.
Though I do make a concerted effort to teach my boys, that Jesus wants to be their friend and we very often compare how we treat our human friends to how we treat Jesus.
Dorothy does an awesome job of breaking that down in this article.
Children Need to Have a Relationship with Jesus
Friday, June 18, 2010
Love You, Daddy!
With Father’s Day coming up I find myself lamenting about my relationship with my Dad. My Dad may not have been the perfect model of a husband and father, and I won’t share the negative details here out of respect for him and my family. Being the youngest of 4 children, I know my siblings have a different experience of Dad – it shows through our current relationship with him.
Our father, daughter relationship has been through many changes, some I am sure are typical of any healthy father, daughter relationship - from idolizing him as a child, to thinking little of him during the rebellious teen years and then respecting him again as an adult.
Some of the best childhood memories I have are of my Dad, taking the time to play with me, laugh with me. I recall us watching the Saturday morning cartoons together, or the Sunday afternoon Disney movie, at times I believe he was enjoying the show more than I was. He always let me win when we played ‘Connect Four’ and he taught me how to dance. I also remember watching him dance with Mom, they looked like they’d been partners forever, their movements were so fluid and natural.
Thankfully, my Dad is still with us, so I can share these memories with him still. However, his health is deteriorating, which may be the inspiration for this lament.
Through my teen and young adult years I learned some things about my Dad that shattered the view of the man I idolized. He has made some decisions I know he isn’t proud of; choices that have caused much pain, heartache and regret. It was difficult to come back to seeing him as someone I should respect but by the grace of God, I have.
You see, whatever decisions he made as a man, decisions that are on his regret list – I know that becoming a husband and father are not on that list. I can still look at him and see the man I idolized as a child.
Even though our relationship is far from perfect, even though he wasn’t always emotionally available to me – he has given me awesome memories that I will always cherish. This consolation I take with me, as I witness my own husband with our boys. I watch them play together, laugh together and I know no matter how imperfect our marriage is, how much we struggle to ensure they learn the important things, in the end, they too will have these awesome memories to cherish.
Happy Father’s Day, Daddy! Love you.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Letter from Linda
Letter from Linda Gibbons dated May 3, 2010
Greetings in our Risen and Returning Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ!
Pray this finds you well having celebrated a most holy Easter.
Thank you so much for sending the article “Freedom of Choice or Right to Life” It was astute in dismantling the false notion that killing innocents is any kind of right.
Recently I was sent an article written by Joe Bissonnette, titled, “Abortion, Conscience, Crisis and the Church” It was published in the Human Life Review. It is a telling article that is a litmus test of where we are as well as a call to action for pro-lifers and the Church.
For there to be change their needs an impetus (catalyst of urgency if you will) to bring needed tension to the issue that cannot be ignored. It happened with the apprehension of the Jews, the slavery of the blacks and the segregation of the Afro-Americans in the States. All these social aberrations fell before social conscience and reasoned to action.
Abraham Lincoln in 1858 said in part, “In my opinion, it will not cease, until a crisis shall have been reached, and passed. A house divided against itself cannot stand.”
We can no longer sing, “What will be, will be” because the death culture turned Canada on itself and the social network is coming undone at the seams. We will either rethink and turn back or slide into the abyss of euthanasia of the elderly and disabled and anyone else that would like to die. Or perhaps we’ll be spared these death throes of a society by an all out war from the hand of a just God. Maybe when the body bags pile up we’ll express our compunction with death mongerings.
There is much talk of late in the public square related to the abortion issue. Perhaps it’s indicative of a ground swell of resistance to the death dictators who would make our politicians their marionettes of evil.
Regardless we’ve seen “a few good men” soundly defeat the euthanasia bill and put to bed the play to export abortion along with Harpers Maternal health plan for 3rd world. Now we have to keep vigilant and keep the momentum growing.
All for good; all for God; Pray so.
Jesus said, “A little child shall lead them”
I am enclosing an article by a 13 year old; Elizabeth Trisler She’ll be tomorrows pro-life leader and a power to be reckoned with.
A pro-abortion leader at the U.S. March for Life lamented his “militant menopausal’s” compared to the vibrant pro-life young women. Funny, eh!
We greying post-in veterans of the cause will not take umbrage – we need someone to throw the torch to!
Thanks again for loving life!
Love in Jesus,
Linda
Recently learned about another pro-life prisoner in our midst: Mary Wagner
Please keep these women in your prayers and reach out to them to show your support by writing to them in prison!
Monday, June 14, 2010
Part 4: Twilight Untwisted:Why Are Women Attracted to Edward?
In this series, I am constantly asking myself: Why is it that most of the good/true messages come from Edward who represents the perversion of human nature, the monster? I don’t know that I can answer this, but this is the reality of Stephanie Meyer’s characters, the vampires, at least the Cullen family of vampires seem [...]
Read more of this post
Read more of this post
Friday, June 11, 2010
Part 3: Twilight Untwisted: Wheat Among the Weeds
Reflecting on the parable that Jesus gave us in Matthew 13:24-30; Some of the reviews of Twilight that I have read from other Catholics, have focussed more on pointing out the weeds in this story. However, if we listen to Christ, he tells us that when we do that we uproot what is good [...]
Read more of this post: Living Water at Wordpress
Read more of this post: Living Water at Wordpress
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Forgiveness in Marriage
I like to remind the couples we work with in the marriage preparation courses that communication is the life blood of their relationship, and forgiveness is the cement.
At times, one of the individuals in the group will question this...viewing this like a “get out of jail free card” Doesn’t this unconditional forgiveness provide an opportunity for one of the spouse’s to assume they can do whatever they want, because even if it is hurtful to their spouse they “trust” that they will eventually forgive them?
Then we review the Reconciliation model, as it applies to the Sacrament of Confession. For many of the couples this model is simply a review, for others it’s an eye opening reminder of what a treasure this Sacrament is as we’ve witnessed what we like to call a “holy spirit moment” Even non-Catholics have shared with us that this model helped them to understand the sacrament, but what is most important is understanding what it truly means to forgive, especially in a marriage.
This is what we share with them.
There are four essential ingredients to attaining forgiveness. These are important in a marriage, but can also be applied to any relationship, including your relationship with God.
CONFESSION – Admitting you did something wrong and taking responsibility for your own actions.
CONTRITION – Accepting and understanding how your actions hurt/affected others.
PENANCE – Action that demonstrates how sorry you are and how you want to make up for the wrong you’ve done.
ABSOLUTION – Involves a release from the offended party, freedom and trust that this incident will not come up in future discussions or disagreements. True absolution can only be obtained through the actual sacrament of reconciliation.
No one is owed forgiveness. Forgiveness is a gift, but it is absolutely necessary in a marriage.
For further resource review a previous post titled: The Healing Power of Forgiveness.
Does there really need to be an apology in order for forgiveness to occur in marriage? What would Jesus say? Did his murderers apologize?
There is a couple who are preparing to celebrate 50 years of marriage. Over the years Chris and Sophia, have dealt with many challenges that came with migrating to a different country, physical separation early in their marriage; infidelity; financial struggles; addiction; the abuse of one of their children by another adult; supporting the children through various medical issues.
Most recently their challenges are of a different kind. Approximately 10 years ago, Chris was diagnosed with dementia. The symptoms include paranoia, hallucinations, agitation and inability to reason; he directs all this towards Sophia. Needless to say the time period leading up to a proper diagnosis was difficult on Sophia, as he accused her of awful acts that she is not capable of committing.
Lately, the dementia seems to be under control with the medication, his physical ability is deteriorating. Sophia provides constant care for Chris; he requires her assistance with his regular daily activities. Yet, he continually accuses her of the same awful acts, truly portraying his own guilt on to her.
However, she continually cares for him, even though he is verbally abusive to her. Some days she breaks down and cries, always she turns to Christ in prayer for strength to embrace her cross. Every day that she looks upon the man that she married, she sees the shell of the man she once knew and she chooses to constantly forgive him. Every day she repeats the words of Christ, “forgive him Father, for he does not know what he is doing.”
Her hope is that Christ will provide a few moments of sanity, when Chris will apologize for all that he has put them through. Not for her own desire to hear his apology, but because she can’t imagine the pain it must cause Chris to believe his wife is capable of doing these things to him.
In today’s world, this type of constant forgiving is rarely heard of. Yet this couple does live among us, providing a constant example of what it means to forgive within a marriage. It is the forgiveness that is the cement in this marriage, a house built not on sand, but on solid rock.
At times, one of the individuals in the group will question this...viewing this like a “get out of jail free card” Doesn’t this unconditional forgiveness provide an opportunity for one of the spouse’s to assume they can do whatever they want, because even if it is hurtful to their spouse they “trust” that they will eventually forgive them?
Then we review the Reconciliation model, as it applies to the Sacrament of Confession. For many of the couples this model is simply a review, for others it’s an eye opening reminder of what a treasure this Sacrament is as we’ve witnessed what we like to call a “holy spirit moment” Even non-Catholics have shared with us that this model helped them to understand the sacrament, but what is most important is understanding what it truly means to forgive, especially in a marriage.
This is what we share with them.
There are four essential ingredients to attaining forgiveness. These are important in a marriage, but can also be applied to any relationship, including your relationship with God.
CONFESSION – Admitting you did something wrong and taking responsibility for your own actions.
CONTRITION – Accepting and understanding how your actions hurt/affected others.
PENANCE – Action that demonstrates how sorry you are and how you want to make up for the wrong you’ve done.
ABSOLUTION – Involves a release from the offended party, freedom and trust that this incident will not come up in future discussions or disagreements. True absolution can only be obtained through the actual sacrament of reconciliation.
No one is owed forgiveness. Forgiveness is a gift, but it is absolutely necessary in a marriage.
For further resource review a previous post titled: The Healing Power of Forgiveness.
Does there really need to be an apology in order for forgiveness to occur in marriage? What would Jesus say? Did his murderers apologize?
There is a couple who are preparing to celebrate 50 years of marriage. Over the years Chris and Sophia, have dealt with many challenges that came with migrating to a different country, physical separation early in their marriage; infidelity; financial struggles; addiction; the abuse of one of their children by another adult; supporting the children through various medical issues.
Most recently their challenges are of a different kind. Approximately 10 years ago, Chris was diagnosed with dementia. The symptoms include paranoia, hallucinations, agitation and inability to reason; he directs all this towards Sophia. Needless to say the time period leading up to a proper diagnosis was difficult on Sophia, as he accused her of awful acts that she is not capable of committing.
Lately, the dementia seems to be under control with the medication, his physical ability is deteriorating. Sophia provides constant care for Chris; he requires her assistance with his regular daily activities. Yet, he continually accuses her of the same awful acts, truly portraying his own guilt on to her.
However, she continually cares for him, even though he is verbally abusive to her. Some days she breaks down and cries, always she turns to Christ in prayer for strength to embrace her cross. Every day that she looks upon the man that she married, she sees the shell of the man she once knew and she chooses to constantly forgive him. Every day she repeats the words of Christ, “forgive him Father, for he does not know what he is doing.”
Her hope is that Christ will provide a few moments of sanity, when Chris will apologize for all that he has put them through. Not for her own desire to hear his apology, but because she can’t imagine the pain it must cause Chris to believe his wife is capable of doing these things to him.
In today’s world, this type of constant forgiving is rarely heard of. Yet this couple does live among us, providing a constant example of what it means to forgive within a marriage. It is the forgiveness that is the cement in this marriage, a house built not on sand, but on solid rock.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Twilight Untwisted: A Catholic Mom's Perspective
Finally ready to share my musings on this series. If you are interested in reading it. Find it here: Living Water at Wordpress.com
Monday, May 31, 2010
The Hope of the Pro-Life Mission
Letter from Linda Gibbons – Pro – Life Prisoner
March 2, 2009
“ Hope is... Faith holding out its hand in the dark” George Iles
Considering the Bible says we should be ready to give a reason for the hope that is within us, I wanted to share some thoughts on the hope our pro-life mission embodies while we are in the front of the abortuaries.
Pope Benedict in his Encyclical on Christian hope wrote, “From the hope of these people who have been touched by Christ, hope has risen for others who were living in darkness and without hope.”
We too, come in faith and in hope that those who have allowed themselves to be made prisoners of a death culture might be set free. (“Abortion represents the absence of freedom and the presence of bondage in an absolute sense.”)
It is not persuasive words that free these despairing mothers, rather our concerned presence with them gives them cause to hope. In us they might encounter Gods providence moving towards them, offering them relief from abandoned hope.
They can exchange the “ashen apples” of procured abortion for hope that is stronger than death.
We also acknowledge the hand of providence that places us there. When God is at work it is little to do with our efforts and everything to do with fulfilling his purposes and plans. His testimony of life is the bedrock for solid hope.
Our allegiance to life is unequivocal and we don’t allow pervasiveness of the present tyranny against unborn life to deter us or cause to relinquish our hope.
Pope Benedict warns, “If we cannot hope for more than is effectively attainable at any given time our lives will soon be without hope.”
In this paradox of becoming as the Bible describes, “prisoners of hope” we divest ourselves of liberty that the unborn’s intrinsic liberty might be made manifest. To not accept any liberty which the unborn cannot have is to insist on their equal rights before the law.
To be authentically human is to take up our civic responsibility to restore cohesion in the human family and build up the foundation of justice for the next generation so that they are free to be born and have their rightful inheritance of love. Our hope bears all trials and impositions’ looking to the future in faith, believing something worthwhile is being accomplished.
One wrote, “the best use of life is to spend it for something that outlasts it” We have a charge to keep to the next generation.
As the bird sensing the dawn commences to sing; while it’s yet dark our hope resonates with a lasting love that will be felt in generations to come.
Wishing you a most blessed and holy Easter.
Love in Christ the King,
Linda
March 2, 2009
“ Hope is... Faith holding out its hand in the dark” George Iles
Considering the Bible says we should be ready to give a reason for the hope that is within us, I wanted to share some thoughts on the hope our pro-life mission embodies while we are in the front of the abortuaries.
Pope Benedict in his Encyclical on Christian hope wrote, “From the hope of these people who have been touched by Christ, hope has risen for others who were living in darkness and without hope.”
We too, come in faith and in hope that those who have allowed themselves to be made prisoners of a death culture might be set free. (“Abortion represents the absence of freedom and the presence of bondage in an absolute sense.”)
It is not persuasive words that free these despairing mothers, rather our concerned presence with them gives them cause to hope. In us they might encounter Gods providence moving towards them, offering them relief from abandoned hope.
They can exchange the “ashen apples” of procured abortion for hope that is stronger than death.
We also acknowledge the hand of providence that places us there. When God is at work it is little to do with our efforts and everything to do with fulfilling his purposes and plans. His testimony of life is the bedrock for solid hope.
Our allegiance to life is unequivocal and we don’t allow pervasiveness of the present tyranny against unborn life to deter us or cause to relinquish our hope.
Pope Benedict warns, “If we cannot hope for more than is effectively attainable at any given time our lives will soon be without hope.”
In this paradox of becoming as the Bible describes, “prisoners of hope” we divest ourselves of liberty that the unborn’s intrinsic liberty might be made manifest. To not accept any liberty which the unborn cannot have is to insist on their equal rights before the law.
To be authentically human is to take up our civic responsibility to restore cohesion in the human family and build up the foundation of justice for the next generation so that they are free to be born and have their rightful inheritance of love. Our hope bears all trials and impositions’ looking to the future in faith, believing something worthwhile is being accomplished.
One wrote, “the best use of life is to spend it for something that outlasts it” We have a charge to keep to the next generation.
As the bird sensing the dawn commences to sing; while it’s yet dark our hope resonates with a lasting love that will be felt in generations to come.
Wishing you a most blessed and holy Easter.
Love in Christ the King,
Linda
Monday, May 17, 2010
Pro-Life Martyr in our Midst
In 2008, we learned about a Pro-life grandmother, Linda Gibbons, who is imprisoned for taking a stand outside an abortion clinic. There is a court order that prohibits any pro-life activity within 60 feet of this clinic.
You can learn more about her here: http://www.lifesitenews.com/gibbons/When we learned she was to spend Christmas in custody, we as a family decided to reach out to her, we sent her a simple Christmas greeting card to assure her of our prayers and encourage her in this mission of speaking for the unborn.
This was her response:
December 22, 2008
Now thanks be unto God, which always causes us to triumph in Christ...II Corinthians 2:14
Greetings in the Princes of Life, Pray this finds you well and rejoicing in al He is this Holy season.
Thank you for the lovely card of Mother + Child, quite lovely. It was so kind of you to remember me at this busy time of year and thanks too for your loyal prayers.
What glad news you bring me about 441 babies saved because of the 40 days of fasting and prayer project! What fasting! What prayers!
It was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Who said, “Injustice must be rooted out by strong persistent and determined action.”
Our ex-Prime Minister, Mr. Chretien said Canada is at peace with abortion. There can be no peace where there is no justice. Till we return protection to innocent life in the womb, O Canada, the bell tolls for thee!
My mail which I am calling “The Canadian Response” speaks of better things – a country that stands on guard for each and every child.
So Fight the Good Fight!
All God’s Blessings and supply in 2009!
Love in the Christ Child,
Linda
You can learn more about her here: http://www.lifesitenews.com/gibbons/When we learned she was to spend Christmas in custody, we as a family decided to reach out to her, we sent her a simple Christmas greeting card to assure her of our prayers and encourage her in this mission of speaking for the unborn.
This was her response:
December 22, 2008
Now thanks be unto God, which always causes us to triumph in Christ...II Corinthians 2:14
Greetings in the Princes of Life, Pray this finds you well and rejoicing in al He is this Holy season.
Thank you for the lovely card of Mother + Child, quite lovely. It was so kind of you to remember me at this busy time of year and thanks too for your loyal prayers.
What glad news you bring me about 441 babies saved because of the 40 days of fasting and prayer project! What fasting! What prayers!
It was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Who said, “Injustice must be rooted out by strong persistent and determined action.”
Our ex-Prime Minister, Mr. Chretien said Canada is at peace with abortion. There can be no peace where there is no justice. Till we return protection to innocent life in the womb, O Canada, the bell tolls for thee!
My mail which I am calling “The Canadian Response” speaks of better things – a country that stands on guard for each and every child.
So Fight the Good Fight!
All God’s Blessings and supply in 2009!
Love in the Christ Child,
Linda
Monday, May 3, 2010
We're on God's Time
Recently we experienced a death in the family. It’s interesting how God uses times like these to remind us that we are on His time and not ours.
You see we received a phone call early one Saturday morning that our family member was in the hospital and not doing so well. Being a Saturday, we had so many errands to run, the thought crossed our mind that we should forego the regular busy Saturday morning routine and rush to be there for our family, yet somehow we paid more attention to the idea that there would be time to run the errands and then be there for our family.
So we attempted to do just that. Assuming that the day would unfold as we had planned, with the time we believed we had.
It is only by the grace of God that we fit in a prayer for our dying loved one and the family in the midst of our errands. The Lord knew those prayers were very much-needed because we were on His time and not ours.
That still small voice that nudged us to drop everything to be there physically, the one we so easily ignored, was the one we first recalled when events unfolded more quickly than we’d anticipated.
Why are we surprised when days don’t unfold the way we had planned? Why do we hang on to this notion that we have some control over how much time we have to get things done?
Isn’t that exactly what the devil needs from us? That we’d live our lives believing we have plenty of time…
Thank you Lord, for reminding me and my family that we are on your time! Help us to be more attentive to your still, small voice. Help us to live a life that is well-balanced between the sense of urgency required to respond effectively to your call and the sense of peace that comes with knowing that you are in control.
You see we received a phone call early one Saturday morning that our family member was in the hospital and not doing so well. Being a Saturday, we had so many errands to run, the thought crossed our mind that we should forego the regular busy Saturday morning routine and rush to be there for our family, yet somehow we paid more attention to the idea that there would be time to run the errands and then be there for our family.
So we attempted to do just that. Assuming that the day would unfold as we had planned, with the time we believed we had.
It is only by the grace of God that we fit in a prayer for our dying loved one and the family in the midst of our errands. The Lord knew those prayers were very much-needed because we were on His time and not ours.
That still small voice that nudged us to drop everything to be there physically, the one we so easily ignored, was the one we first recalled when events unfolded more quickly than we’d anticipated.
Why are we surprised when days don’t unfold the way we had planned? Why do we hang on to this notion that we have some control over how much time we have to get things done?
Isn’t that exactly what the devil needs from us? That we’d live our lives believing we have plenty of time…
Thank you Lord, for reminding me and my family that we are on your time! Help us to be more attentive to your still, small voice. Help us to live a life that is well-balanced between the sense of urgency required to respond effectively to your call and the sense of peace that comes with knowing that you are in control.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Letter to the Editor at National Catholic Register
There is something very humbling about seeing your name in print next to these well formed, and informed Catholic writers. They actually printed my letter in the National Catholic Register!
It was in response to a letter by another individual that felt abortion and contraception should be included as part of womens health in foreign aid.
Fellow Canadian’s Chagrin
Keep up the good work. It was nice to see Canadian news included in the paper.
Responding to the letter submitted by Elena Shen of London, Ontario, in the March 14 edition. She was responding to the headline “Northern Fights” in the Feb. 28 print edition.
I was compelled to respond to this letter, as I was saddened by this response. I agree that abortion and contraception are opposed to women’s health and challenge those who think otherwise to research the effects that contraception and abortion have on the woman’s body, as well as her psychological well-being. Even if we eliminate the moral implications of contraception and abortion, it is still very clear that contraception and abortion only causes more harm. Pregnancy is not a disease; it is a natural process for women who engage in sexual activity. What is needed as part of women’s health is education on how the woman’s body provides fertile and infertile times within her cycle.
To claim that abortion can assist in improving children’s health is to say that murder is all right and should be legal if it means killing someone who makes my life more difficult. Murder is illegal in Canada when it involves a person outside the womb, yet murders still happen. Does this mean we should rethink this law and make it easier? What is a safe abortion? Abortion is murder.
Poverty is not the result of overpopulation; in fact, it is the result of corrupt governments. Many of us have forgotten that we are all responsible to care for others, the poor and marginalized, the sick and the dying. Offering contraception and abortion as part of women’s health, even to underdeveloped countries, is like offering a soiled tissue as a bandage to someone with a severed limb.
In my opinion, Harper’s government should be working to ensure Christian ideologies are part of their decision-making at home and abroad. This is not Harper’s theology; this is God’s.
Obviously, there is much more to say on this topic, especially if we include the moral implications and Church teaching on contraception and abortion. Instead, I’ll conclude with the words of Christ:
“The poor you will always have with you, but you do not always have me” (Matthew 26:11).
“And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea” (Matthew 18: 5-6).
Fatima Borges
It was in response to a letter by another individual that felt abortion and contraception should be included as part of womens health in foreign aid.
Fellow Canadian’s Chagrin
Keep up the good work. It was nice to see Canadian news included in the paper.
Responding to the letter submitted by Elena Shen of London, Ontario, in the March 14 edition. She was responding to the headline “Northern Fights” in the Feb. 28 print edition.
I was compelled to respond to this letter, as I was saddened by this response. I agree that abortion and contraception are opposed to women’s health and challenge those who think otherwise to research the effects that contraception and abortion have on the woman’s body, as well as her psychological well-being. Even if we eliminate the moral implications of contraception and abortion, it is still very clear that contraception and abortion only causes more harm. Pregnancy is not a disease; it is a natural process for women who engage in sexual activity. What is needed as part of women’s health is education on how the woman’s body provides fertile and infertile times within her cycle.
To claim that abortion can assist in improving children’s health is to say that murder is all right and should be legal if it means killing someone who makes my life more difficult. Murder is illegal in Canada when it involves a person outside the womb, yet murders still happen. Does this mean we should rethink this law and make it easier? What is a safe abortion? Abortion is murder.
Poverty is not the result of overpopulation; in fact, it is the result of corrupt governments. Many of us have forgotten that we are all responsible to care for others, the poor and marginalized, the sick and the dying. Offering contraception and abortion as part of women’s health, even to underdeveloped countries, is like offering a soiled tissue as a bandage to someone with a severed limb.
In my opinion, Harper’s government should be working to ensure Christian ideologies are part of their decision-making at home and abroad. This is not Harper’s theology; this is God’s.
Obviously, there is much more to say on this topic, especially if we include the moral implications and Church teaching on contraception and abortion. Instead, I’ll conclude with the words of Christ:
“The poor you will always have with you, but you do not always have me” (Matthew 26:11).
“And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea” (Matthew 18: 5-6).
Fatima Borges
Monday, April 12, 2010
New York former Jewish mayor addresses anti-Catholocism in the media
Koch's Comments New York's legendary Jewish former mayor Ed Koch address' anti-Catholicism in the media.
Koch's comments:
I believe the continuing attacks by the media on the Roman Catholic Church and Pope Benedict XVI have become manifestations of anti-Catholicism. The procession of articles on the same events are, in my opinion, no longer intended to inform, but simply to castigate.
The sexual molestation of children, principally boys, is horrendous. This is agreed to by everyone, Catholics, the Church itself, as well as non-Catholics and the media. The pope has on a number of occasions on behalf of the Church admitted fault and asked for forgiveness. For example, The New York Times reported on April 18, 2008, that the pope "came face to face with a scandal that has left lasting wounds on the American church Thursday, holding a surprise meeting with several victims of sexual abuse by priests in the Boston area.... 'No words of mine could describe the pain and harm inflicted by such abuse,' the Pope said in his homily. 'It is important that those who have suffered be given loving pastoral attention.'"
On March 20, 2010, the Times reported that in his eight page pastoral letter to Irish Catholics, the pope wrote, "You have suffered grievously, and I am truly sorry ... Your trust has been betrayed and your dignity has been violated."
The pope also "criticized Ireland's bishops for 'grave errors of judgment and failures of leadership.'"
The primary explanation for the abuse that happened - not to excuse the retention of priests in positions that enabled them to continue to harm children - was the belief that the priests could be cured by psychotherapy, a theory now long discarded by the medical profession. Regrettably, it is also likely that years ago the abuse of children was not taken as seriously as today. Thank God we've progressed on that issue.
Many of those in the media who are pounding on the Church and the pope today clearly do it with delight, and some with malice. The reason, I believe, for the constant assaults is that there are many in the media, and some Catholics as well as many in the public, who object to and are incensed by positions the Church holds, including opposition to all abortions, opposition to gay sex and same-sex marriage, retention of celibacy rules for priests, exclusion of women from the clergy, opposition to birth control measures involving condoms and prescription drugs and opposition to civil divorce. My good friend, John Cardinal O'Connor, once said, "The Church is not a salad bar, from which to pick and choose what pleases you." The Church has the right to demand fulfillment of all of its religious obligations by its parishioners, and indeed a right to espouse its beliefs generally.
I disagree with the Church on all of these positions. Nevertheless, it has a right to hold these views in accordance with its religious beliefs. I disagree with many tenets of Orthodox Judaism - the religion of my birth - and have chosen to follow the tenets of Conservative Judaism, while I attend an Orthodox synagogue. Orthodox Jews, like the Roman Catholic Church, can demand absolute obedience to religious rules. Those declining to adhere are free to leave.
I believe the Roman Catholic Church is a force for good in the world, not evil. Moreover, the existence of one billion, 130 million Catholics worldwide is important to the peace and prosperity of the planet.
Of course, the media should report to the public any new facts bearing upon the issue of child molestation, but its objectivity and credibility are damaged when the New York Times declines to publish an op-ed offered by New York Archbishop Timothy Dolan on the issue of anti-Catholicism and offers instead to publish a letter to the editor, which is much shorter and less prominent than an op-ed.
I am appalled that, according to the Times of April 6, 2010, "Last week, the center-left daily newspaper La Repubblica wrote, without attribution that 'certain Catholic circles' believed the criticism of the Church stemmed from 'a New York Jewish lobby.'" The pope should know that some of his fellow priests can be thoughtless or worse in their efforts to help him. If the "certain Catholic circles" were referring to the Times, the Pope should know that the publisher, Arthur Sulzberger, Jr., is Episcopalian, having taken the religion of his mother, and its executive editor, Bill Keller, is also a Christian.
Enough is enough. Yes, terrible acts were committed by members of the Catholic clergy. The Church has paid billions to victims in the US and will pay millions, perhaps billions, more to other such victims around the world. It is trying desperately to atone for its past by its admissions and changes in procedures for dealing with pedophile priests. I will close with a paraphrase of the words of Jesus as set forth in John 8:7: He [or she] that is without sin among you, let him [or her] cast the next stone.
http://cgis.jpost.com/Blogs/koch/entry/he_that_is_without_sin
Koch's comments:
I believe the continuing attacks by the media on the Roman Catholic Church and Pope Benedict XVI have become manifestations of anti-Catholicism. The procession of articles on the same events are, in my opinion, no longer intended to inform, but simply to castigate.
The sexual molestation of children, principally boys, is horrendous. This is agreed to by everyone, Catholics, the Church itself, as well as non-Catholics and the media. The pope has on a number of occasions on behalf of the Church admitted fault and asked for forgiveness. For example, The New York Times reported on April 18, 2008, that the pope "came face to face with a scandal that has left lasting wounds on the American church Thursday, holding a surprise meeting with several victims of sexual abuse by priests in the Boston area.... 'No words of mine could describe the pain and harm inflicted by such abuse,' the Pope said in his homily. 'It is important that those who have suffered be given loving pastoral attention.'"
On March 20, 2010, the Times reported that in his eight page pastoral letter to Irish Catholics, the pope wrote, "You have suffered grievously, and I am truly sorry ... Your trust has been betrayed and your dignity has been violated."
The pope also "criticized Ireland's bishops for 'grave errors of judgment and failures of leadership.'"
The primary explanation for the abuse that happened - not to excuse the retention of priests in positions that enabled them to continue to harm children - was the belief that the priests could be cured by psychotherapy, a theory now long discarded by the medical profession. Regrettably, it is also likely that years ago the abuse of children was not taken as seriously as today. Thank God we've progressed on that issue.
Many of those in the media who are pounding on the Church and the pope today clearly do it with delight, and some with malice. The reason, I believe, for the constant assaults is that there are many in the media, and some Catholics as well as many in the public, who object to and are incensed by positions the Church holds, including opposition to all abortions, opposition to gay sex and same-sex marriage, retention of celibacy rules for priests, exclusion of women from the clergy, opposition to birth control measures involving condoms and prescription drugs and opposition to civil divorce. My good friend, John Cardinal O'Connor, once said, "The Church is not a salad bar, from which to pick and choose what pleases you." The Church has the right to demand fulfillment of all of its religious obligations by its parishioners, and indeed a right to espouse its beliefs generally.
I disagree with the Church on all of these positions. Nevertheless, it has a right to hold these views in accordance with its religious beliefs. I disagree with many tenets of Orthodox Judaism - the religion of my birth - and have chosen to follow the tenets of Conservative Judaism, while I attend an Orthodox synagogue. Orthodox Jews, like the Roman Catholic Church, can demand absolute obedience to religious rules. Those declining to adhere are free to leave.
I believe the Roman Catholic Church is a force for good in the world, not evil. Moreover, the existence of one billion, 130 million Catholics worldwide is important to the peace and prosperity of the planet.
Of course, the media should report to the public any new facts bearing upon the issue of child molestation, but its objectivity and credibility are damaged when the New York Times declines to publish an op-ed offered by New York Archbishop Timothy Dolan on the issue of anti-Catholicism and offers instead to publish a letter to the editor, which is much shorter and less prominent than an op-ed.
I am appalled that, according to the Times of April 6, 2010, "Last week, the center-left daily newspaper La Repubblica wrote, without attribution that 'certain Catholic circles' believed the criticism of the Church stemmed from 'a New York Jewish lobby.'" The pope should know that some of his fellow priests can be thoughtless or worse in their efforts to help him. If the "certain Catholic circles" were referring to the Times, the Pope should know that the publisher, Arthur Sulzberger, Jr., is Episcopalian, having taken the religion of his mother, and its executive editor, Bill Keller, is also a Christian.
Enough is enough. Yes, terrible acts were committed by members of the Catholic clergy. The Church has paid billions to victims in the US and will pay millions, perhaps billions, more to other such victims around the world. It is trying desperately to atone for its past by its admissions and changes in procedures for dealing with pedophile priests. I will close with a paraphrase of the words of Jesus as set forth in John 8:7: He [or she] that is without sin among you, let him [or her] cast the next stone.
http://cgis.jpost.com/Blogs/koch/entry/he_that_is_without_sin
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Seeking the Truth
My take on the media's response to the Pope's letter to Ireland...
While it may be a tough time to hold fast to our Catholic faith, we must recall that this is why we detest sin...it causes distrust, confusion, scandal and so much pain.
Christ who is the author of truth and justice defeated death the day of his resurrection. I pray for all of you who are struggling to understand how this happens and questioning or doubting your faith as a result of what you are hearing in the media, I implore you to look at Christ, and spend some time with him in the Garden of Gethsemane, when Christ became sin look what it did to Him. He sweat blood!
Take courage! In Church history we see that during the times of great scandal there was also great renewal and many devout saints who were hard at work. So let’s get to work and not allow ourselves to be discouraged. Let’s continue to defend Christ and His Church, this way we do not let Christ suffer alone.
I include this article from ZENIT for those of you who would like to know the truth and not the distortions that secular media are providing for us.
Have a Blessed Holy Week!
Vatican Notes "Mere Speculation" in New York Times
Reiterates Information Provided by Munich Archdiocese
VATICAN CITY, MARCH 26, 2010 (Zenit.org).- Attempts by the New York Times to personally embroil Benedict XVI in the sex abuse scandals are "mere speculation," the Vatican spokesman said today.
In an article today, the Times took up a story reported earlier about a priest allowed to do pastoral work in the Archdiocese of Munich even though he was receiving psychological treatment for a history of abuse. The archbishop at the time was Joseph Ratzinger. Since the story of the priest has been reported, Archbishop Ratzinger's then vicar general, Monsignor Gerhard Gruber, has accepted full responsibility for the priest's assignment.
Today, Jesuit Father Federico Lombardi, director of the Vatican press office, was asked about the Times article.
He answered by making reference to a communiquรฉ from the Archdiocese of Munich this morning. The communiquรฉ states: "The article in the New York Times contains no new information beyond that which the archdiocese has already communicated concerning the then archbishop's knowledge of the situation of Father H."
Father Lombardi thus confirmed that the Munich Archdiocese rejects any version of events that attributes knowledge of the case to Archbishop Ratzinger, calling it "mere speculation."
This is the second day in a row that the Times has tried to implicate the Pope personally in abuse scandals. An article Thursday regarding a priest of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee also spoke of his role, this time as the prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith.
ZENIT reported the Vatican's response to that article and clarified certain details of the case on Thursday.
While it may be a tough time to hold fast to our Catholic faith, we must recall that this is why we detest sin...it causes distrust, confusion, scandal and so much pain.
Christ who is the author of truth and justice defeated death the day of his resurrection. I pray for all of you who are struggling to understand how this happens and questioning or doubting your faith as a result of what you are hearing in the media, I implore you to look at Christ, and spend some time with him in the Garden of Gethsemane, when Christ became sin look what it did to Him. He sweat blood!
Take courage! In Church history we see that during the times of great scandal there was also great renewal and many devout saints who were hard at work. So let’s get to work and not allow ourselves to be discouraged. Let’s continue to defend Christ and His Church, this way we do not let Christ suffer alone.
I include this article from ZENIT for those of you who would like to know the truth and not the distortions that secular media are providing for us.
Have a Blessed Holy Week!
Vatican Notes "Mere Speculation" in New York Times
Reiterates Information Provided by Munich Archdiocese
VATICAN CITY, MARCH 26, 2010 (Zenit.org).- Attempts by the New York Times to personally embroil Benedict XVI in the sex abuse scandals are "mere speculation," the Vatican spokesman said today.
In an article today, the Times took up a story reported earlier about a priest allowed to do pastoral work in the Archdiocese of Munich even though he was receiving psychological treatment for a history of abuse. The archbishop at the time was Joseph Ratzinger. Since the story of the priest has been reported, Archbishop Ratzinger's then vicar general, Monsignor Gerhard Gruber, has accepted full responsibility for the priest's assignment.
Today, Jesuit Father Federico Lombardi, director of the Vatican press office, was asked about the Times article.
He answered by making reference to a communiquรฉ from the Archdiocese of Munich this morning. The communiquรฉ states: "The article in the New York Times contains no new information beyond that which the archdiocese has already communicated concerning the then archbishop's knowledge of the situation of Father H."
Father Lombardi thus confirmed that the Munich Archdiocese rejects any version of events that attributes knowledge of the case to Archbishop Ratzinger, calling it "mere speculation."
This is the second day in a row that the Times has tried to implicate the Pope personally in abuse scandals. An article Thursday regarding a priest of the Archdiocese of Milwaukee also spoke of his role, this time as the prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith.
ZENIT reported the Vatican's response to that article and clarified certain details of the case on Thursday.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Can God Be Trusted?
Some may respond to this question quick and easy, however as Fr. Thomas Williams, LC and my son have figured out, there is much to be said on this topic because in troubled times we doubt God's design.
Watch the video of Fr. Thomas being interviewed on this topic and take the time to read my son's Grade 6 speech on this topic.
Have you ever not trusted someone like your mom or dad? Do you have a valid reason not to trust them? Can we trust them? Well some people have the same questions about God. Today I’m going to try to answer these four questions:
Who is God?
Why should we trust Him?
How can we trust Him when bad things happen?
And why do we have trouble trusting?
These questions will answer the main question Can God be Trusted.
First of all, who is God? God is our creator. God is our savior. God is love. God is the Alpha and Omega. He is the Father. He created angels, man, woman, and animals. God is a mystery. God sees all things, hears all things, and knows all things. You can’t hide from God. If you lie to someone, God knows. God is faithful, merciful, gracious, forgiving and divine.
Well if we know who God is, we get a better picture of what there is to trust. But why should we trust God? God created us. He cares for us at a time of trouble. Imagine a prefect parent. Someone who knows when your upset, or when you’re not telling the truth. We should trust God because he loves us, and cares for us, and would never abandon us.
You need to take a risk in trusting God. Imagine a person who doesn’t trust anyone. What would he or she do? They wouldn’t eat much because they wouldn’t trust farmers or grocery stores and they wouldn’t trust doctors or take medication. We should trust God because he is faithful and fully deserving of our trust. God compares his own faithfulness to a mother in the Bible, and claims to be even more faithful than a mother. How do you think of your mom? Do you trust her?
How can we trust God when bad things happen? When you lose a loved one like a grandparent or an uncle, do you trust that God will take care of them? When we are sick and suffering in pain, do we trust our parents or the Motrin is going to make us better? If we love God and pray to him, he could take the suffering right off of our backs. He probably won’t because he knows we can learn compassion through suffering. There will always be a time when you will look up and say “Why God Why?!” Suffering will always be there because Adam and Eve ate the fruit God said not to eat. They disobeyed God, we all know there are consequences to disobeying our parents. There will always be suffering. It’s our choice to suffer with God, or to suffer alone. Imagine an operation. Do you want to wake up and see someone you love or do you want to wake up in a room all alone?
Why do we have trouble trusting in general? Is it because we are not trust worthy? Do we not like being trusted by parents or friends? It breaks the bond of love not to be trusted. Love and trust go together. We have trouble trusting because we know people make mistakes and because we know we make our own mistakes. It’s all about risk and faith. Faith is a gift from God.
Therefore God is my creator; he knows me better than anyone. Even when I make mistakes, he trusts me to do better next time. He loves me and knows what lessons I need to learn through my suffering and he never abandons me. We tend to think always about how God could allow bad things to happen in our lives and not trust him, but first we need to focus on the good he has done in our lives. Do we have food, clothes, a house, etc?
If I can trust my best friend, how much more should I be able to trust God, my creator?
Thank you and God Bless.
Watch the video of Fr. Thomas being interviewed on this topic and take the time to read my son's Grade 6 speech on this topic.
Have you ever not trusted someone like your mom or dad? Do you have a valid reason not to trust them? Can we trust them? Well some people have the same questions about God. Today I’m going to try to answer these four questions:
Who is God?
Why should we trust Him?
How can we trust Him when bad things happen?
And why do we have trouble trusting?
These questions will answer the main question Can God be Trusted.
First of all, who is God? God is our creator. God is our savior. God is love. God is the Alpha and Omega. He is the Father. He created angels, man, woman, and animals. God is a mystery. God sees all things, hears all things, and knows all things. You can’t hide from God. If you lie to someone, God knows. God is faithful, merciful, gracious, forgiving and divine.
Well if we know who God is, we get a better picture of what there is to trust. But why should we trust God? God created us. He cares for us at a time of trouble. Imagine a prefect parent. Someone who knows when your upset, or when you’re not telling the truth. We should trust God because he loves us, and cares for us, and would never abandon us.
You need to take a risk in trusting God. Imagine a person who doesn’t trust anyone. What would he or she do? They wouldn’t eat much because they wouldn’t trust farmers or grocery stores and they wouldn’t trust doctors or take medication. We should trust God because he is faithful and fully deserving of our trust. God compares his own faithfulness to a mother in the Bible, and claims to be even more faithful than a mother. How do you think of your mom? Do you trust her?
How can we trust God when bad things happen? When you lose a loved one like a grandparent or an uncle, do you trust that God will take care of them? When we are sick and suffering in pain, do we trust our parents or the Motrin is going to make us better? If we love God and pray to him, he could take the suffering right off of our backs. He probably won’t because he knows we can learn compassion through suffering. There will always be a time when you will look up and say “Why God Why?!” Suffering will always be there because Adam and Eve ate the fruit God said not to eat. They disobeyed God, we all know there are consequences to disobeying our parents. There will always be suffering. It’s our choice to suffer with God, or to suffer alone. Imagine an operation. Do you want to wake up and see someone you love or do you want to wake up in a room all alone?
Why do we have trouble trusting in general? Is it because we are not trust worthy? Do we not like being trusted by parents or friends? It breaks the bond of love not to be trusted. Love and trust go together. We have trouble trusting because we know people make mistakes and because we know we make our own mistakes. It’s all about risk and faith. Faith is a gift from God.
Therefore God is my creator; he knows me better than anyone. Even when I make mistakes, he trusts me to do better next time. He loves me and knows what lessons I need to learn through my suffering and he never abandons me. We tend to think always about how God could allow bad things to happen in our lives and not trust him, but first we need to focus on the good he has done in our lives. Do we have food, clothes, a house, etc?
If I can trust my best friend, how much more should I be able to trust God, my creator?
Thank you and God Bless.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Article in Christus Veritas Magazine
Being Worthy in the Eyes of Christ
Christ has called each and every one of us
to live our faith, actively, prayerfully and
effectively.
You can read my complete article at: Christus Veritas
Christ has called each and every one of us
to live our faith, actively, prayerfully and
effectively.
You can read my complete article at: Christus Veritas
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Discussion with Daniel Blodgett
We are on-line.
We were given an awesome opportunity to chat with Daniel Blodgett of Christus Veritas regarding our work in FAMILIA and it is now available on-line.
To listen, click here.
Thank you.
We were given an awesome opportunity to chat with Daniel Blodgett of Christus Veritas regarding our work in FAMILIA and it is now available on-line.
To listen, click here.
Thank you.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
I Love Christ more than sugar...
I love Christ more than sugar...
Sound funny or familiar?
That’s the phrase I tell myself every Lent when I give up “sweets” which includes chocolate, and sugar in my coffee or tea.
We started our countdown of 40 days to Easter and I had a realization the other day, as to how timely Lent really is.
It comes to us a few months after we’ve probably made a new year’s resolution, and by this time many of us may be feeling dejected as we have not lived up to our initial promise.
I have been attempting to impart to my children that Lent is not just a time to give up something for Lent, that we can complain about for 40 days and then look forward to being reunited with whatever it is we’ve given up for Lent; instead we should also see this as a time to be rid of a bad habit and start a new habit that will help us grow in our relationship with Christ.
In that spirit, my Lenten resolution is not just giving up “sweets” - one of the many ways I intend to journey with Christ this Lent is to attend a conference being organized by a friend and sister in Christ, Dorothy Pilarski.
I am so looking forward to this conference for “Dynamic Women of Faith”
Dorothy’s work for Christ is in line with the work we do in Familia, in fact she has been a guest speaker at a women’s event sponsored by Familia in December 2008.
Learn about the conference here: http://www.dynamicwomenfaith.com/
Listen to her radio interview, which includes 8 minutes of the 1st episode of Mothering, Full of Grace at: http://www.hmwn.net/audioarchive/search_results.php?title=Dorothy+Pilarski
Have a holy and reflective Lenten journey to Easter!
Image: Desserts are Laid on the Table by Tino Soriano
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Thursday's Small Successes
This week:
1. Vacuumed and dusted main floor.
2. Attended my son's school liturgy - surprised him, made him smile!
3. Planned family outing with hubby for FAMILY day weekend.
What are your small successes this week? I know you have at least 3....think about it. It's important to run through the good you have done or accomplished. Often times we get so caught up with what we didn't do, that we should've done. This is a good reminder to look on the bright side.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Help for HAITI
Help for Haiti
It’s been disturbing to me, the comments I have heard about the appeals made to all of us, to help and pray for the victims and survivors of the catastrophic earthquake in Haiti.
Most of the resistance I have heard is in the appeal to raise funds to aid the organizations that are organizing relief efforts and sending medical supplies, food, etc.,
The resistance I have witnessed has come from 3 separate angles, which I will address here.
1. “Will my little donation make a difference? Other people are being generous, I don’t have to be.” As we read in Luke 1: 1-4 even though it seems others have taken on a task that is so important, that it seems in the grand scheme of things our contribution will be minimal and insignificant. This sort of thinking did not stop Luke from writing his account of the life of Jesus, the account that would become one of the 4 Gospels, passed on for generations, so that thousands of years later you and I could read it! Well, sure if he hadn’t written it down, we’d still have 3 other Gospels, but Luke is the only one who includes the Visitation and Mother Mary’s song the Magnificat! You see it is clear that no matter how small our contribution may seem, only the Lord knows how He will use it. Remember the poor widow who only gave a penny, Christ said she gave more than all the others in Mark 12: 41-43
2. “Why did the government wait until such a tragedy to organize help? Haiti has always been in need of help?” While there may be some truth to this, my question is, “why would we use this to justify our own neglect of our personal aid to the present victims of the earthquake. We cannot control how others respond, or when, we can control our own responses, and we trust that God knows everyone heart. Unfortunately, for some it takes catastrophes like this for them to realize their compassion, their words, must be turned into action. As St. Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 12:26 the Church is to be united as one body, if one part of the body suffers, we all suffer. In our suffering we remain united, in prayer and almsgiving.
3. “How do I know my donation is actually going to reach the people who need it?” I tremble at the thought, if we all refused to donate because of this way of thinking there would be no aid for anyone in need. It is so difficult for us to trust, especially in today’s world where dishonourable deeds, and misuses and abuses are quickly publicized. Discerning fact from fiction has become a daunting task for some. If I donate $10 and only $5 reaches the people in need, it was $5 more they have. “What happened to the other $5? If it was misused, that is on the conscience of those who misused. We give out of love of neighbour, out of understanding that we are all called to care for each other.
I don’t mean to say it is wrong for us to exercise prudence, and discernment in giving to a reputable, accountable organization, all I mean to say is that we shouldn’t allow these to become obstacles or excuses as to why we refuse to help our brothers and sisters in need. After all, tomorrow it could be you or I who are in need!
Read what our Holy Father has to say: BENEDICT XVI TO HAITI
God Bless!
It’s been disturbing to me, the comments I have heard about the appeals made to all of us, to help and pray for the victims and survivors of the catastrophic earthquake in Haiti.
Most of the resistance I have heard is in the appeal to raise funds to aid the organizations that are organizing relief efforts and sending medical supplies, food, etc.,
The resistance I have witnessed has come from 3 separate angles, which I will address here.
1. “Will my little donation make a difference? Other people are being generous, I don’t have to be.” As we read in Luke 1: 1-4 even though it seems others have taken on a task that is so important, that it seems in the grand scheme of things our contribution will be minimal and insignificant. This sort of thinking did not stop Luke from writing his account of the life of Jesus, the account that would become one of the 4 Gospels, passed on for generations, so that thousands of years later you and I could read it! Well, sure if he hadn’t written it down, we’d still have 3 other Gospels, but Luke is the only one who includes the Visitation and Mother Mary’s song the Magnificat! You see it is clear that no matter how small our contribution may seem, only the Lord knows how He will use it. Remember the poor widow who only gave a penny, Christ said she gave more than all the others in Mark 12: 41-43
2. “Why did the government wait until such a tragedy to organize help? Haiti has always been in need of help?” While there may be some truth to this, my question is, “why would we use this to justify our own neglect of our personal aid to the present victims of the earthquake. We cannot control how others respond, or when, we can control our own responses, and we trust that God knows everyone heart. Unfortunately, for some it takes catastrophes like this for them to realize their compassion, their words, must be turned into action. As St. Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 12:26 the Church is to be united as one body, if one part of the body suffers, we all suffer. In our suffering we remain united, in prayer and almsgiving.
3. “How do I know my donation is actually going to reach the people who need it?” I tremble at the thought, if we all refused to donate because of this way of thinking there would be no aid for anyone in need. It is so difficult for us to trust, especially in today’s world where dishonourable deeds, and misuses and abuses are quickly publicized. Discerning fact from fiction has become a daunting task for some. If I donate $10 and only $5 reaches the people in need, it was $5 more they have. “What happened to the other $5? If it was misused, that is on the conscience of those who misused. We give out of love of neighbour, out of understanding that we are all called to care for each other.
I don’t mean to say it is wrong for us to exercise prudence, and discernment in giving to a reputable, accountable organization, all I mean to say is that we shouldn’t allow these to become obstacles or excuses as to why we refuse to help our brothers and sisters in need. After all, tomorrow it could be you or I who are in need!
Read what our Holy Father has to say: BENEDICT XVI TO HAITI
God Bless!
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